Widow

This is hands-down, the MOST SAD dream I have EVER had.  No contest.
There were kinda two parts of this dream, but interwove in an abstract kinda way.

One of the parts involved me, the munchkin, and some other people... but we were animals.  Munchkin and I were some kind of hairy mammal-- a kind of monkey is my best guess.  there was also some other animals, but they were all fuzzy... kinda like I knew they were there, and they had a voice, but not a defined form beyond furry and large.  Munchkin had been attack by a shark (and we weren't anywhere near a body of water); her arm was brutally torn.  The bone was not broken, but the skin was torn threw all around her forearm, you could see the muscle and flesh just flapping around when she moved.  i laid her on a blanket in the middle of the forest.  we were being chased by poachers. Munchkin suddenly started talking in her little baby voice, but clear words that I could understand, and she asked that I give her back to the shark or just leave her so the poachers could get her since she was injured.  I was crying my eyes out. (remember, that we are some kind of monkey, but still our normal size).  There is another monkey/sloth-person in the tree warning us that the poachers are coming and we need to get away.  I tell munchkin that we need to go, but she can't crawl in the trees and swing because of her arm.  As we hear the poachers getting closer, Munchkin starts crawling on all fours, laughing and smiling, all the while the skin on her arm is just flapping around.  (And, I didn't realize this while I was dreaming, but I did after I woke up and was trying to remember happened-- the injured arms kept changing.  When she was laying on the blanket looking up at me, it was her right arm that was hurt.  But when she was crawling around towards the end, it was her left arm that was injured. I didn't think about it when I was dreaming, it never dawned on me, but when I was recalling what I saw after I woke up, I was trying to remember what arm it was, and realize that it changed part way through).

And now the really sad part--
There were a bunch of my family and Brad's that went to some island forest place for a camping trip.  We had to take planes; Brad and I were on different planes.  When we got there, I couldn't find Brad.  I heard from others that the plane he had been on crash landed and no one could find him; it was rumored that he was dead.  We were there for a week or so.  I looked for him all the time, but couldn't leave the group because it was dangerous away form the camp site, which looked a lot like the Ewok camp form Star Wars, know that I think about it.

At some point during the dream, we ordered pizza... don't know how it got there, but it did.  But something was wrong with it, so I had to put it in the oven and out garlic and oil on the crust of a cinnamon dessert pizza.  Don't ask me why-- I still don't know.

Towards the end of the trip, we all decided to go out hiking in the mountains of the island forest place, looking for the crashed plane and Brad. While climbing up one part of the mountain, I realize that it wasn't a real mountain.  it was some kind of mechanical thing, with a "cover" over it to make it look like a mountain.  Like the texture of a Halloween mask or mechanical dinosaur puppet type thing.  It was all fake.  When I realize this, I suddenly knew that something was wrong.  This is when things that looked like giant hangers with sweaters and dresses and shirts started exploding out of parts of the "mountains." Shot out like lava from an explosive volcano.  We rush to get back to the base camp.  Everyone is trying to find their stuff and get to their plane as fast as possible.

I just know that Brad is gone.  I'm inconsolable.  And I seem to have lost my wedding and engagement rings somewhere.  I feel sick to my stomach, I just want to die.  I'm thinking, "this can't be real.  Brad is going to show up any second and give me a hug and everything will be ok." But he doesn't.  Everyone keeps telling me he is gone.  that he died when the plane crashed upon arrival.  But that at least he died trying to save someone.  Another woman offers to give me her old wedding rings because her husband has been dead for many years.  it is a huge, gaudy piece of gaudy-ness.  Like, a two karat diamond solitaire with a "puzzle band" (like a two part ring that goes together) that is black and silver, and the diamond solitaire ring is white gold.  I out them on, but just kep crying and take it off.  I don't want those-- I want MY rings.  The ones Brad bought me! 

I'm running around, desperately trying to find some of the things he brought.  I want to keep everything to remind me of him.  There's a fork and butter knife that I couldn't find.  A very specific fork and knife that look different form all the other forks and knives that the other brought.  (These are an actual fork and butter knife that we have; I think brad bought them at DI before I even knew him, but we still have them).  I know that there is a date printed on them, and if I knew it, I could remember it.  the date printed on it was 08-13-14, but brad's ghost shows up and tells me that the date printed on it was wrong, it was supposed to be 02-13-03. Neither of those dates are significant to us as far as I know.)  Brad's ghost tells me that I can't touch him, since he's a ghost, but that he will help me find the things I'm looking for.  They happen to be two sweaters, the fork and butter knife, and two buckets of coated gummy candy.  Everyone around me keeps telling me that I can't take the things with, that we have to go. but I can't go.  Brad's ghost is telling em to grab one more thing-- a chocolate bar with his mom's name on it.  He asks me to take it to her.  And I also have to call her and tell her that he's gone. 

He hands me an iPhone to call her, but I can't do it.  I take it with me to the plane, and promise that I will.  I ask him to come with me, but he says he can't.  that it's the last time i will ever see him, since he's a ghost, and i can't hug him.  My arms and my body begin to physically ache to hug him, but there's only emptiness.  It hurts so much.  Like my heart and stomach have been ripped out of me.  he keeps telling me that he will be my guardian angel and always be there, but I won't be able to touch or see him.  he tells me to take care of naomi adn that he will be watching over us and waiting for us.  I'm a bawling mess.  I get one the plane, but befor ewe get off, we have to take a survey about the camping trip for the travel angency.  The only question on my survey asks for my marital status, and the woman sitting next to me tells me that I have to mark "widow."

this is when I woke up.  i was so scared and sad.  And brad wasn't in bed anymore.  (he had gotten up early to put away the clean dishes and load the dishwasher.)  I get out of bed and find brad in the kitchen and just give him the biggest hug.  I wouldn't let him go this morning, I was so distresses after this dream.  I was crying and just wanted the hug to never end.  I kept asking questions and making sure he was real and alive.  i'm pretty sure he thought I was crazy.  I told him my dream, and he continued to reassure me that he was ok.  In fact, he talked to me for 30 minutes and left for work later than he planned because I was such a wreck this morning.  i have the best husband.  when he left this morning, i made him promise to me that he wouldn't die today.  He felt so bad leaving, he wanted to stay with me this morning, but he had to go to work and class, and turn in his homework.  But i'm definitely looking forward to spending time with him tonight.